USASexGuide - Massage Parlor Reports

LexLuther

12-31-06, 15:28

Lex has checked out the Real Doll website. Hate to say it, but it appears that this industry has co-opted the business model of Microsoft. For instance, you will need an upgrade in order to get one with a hairy snatch.

I've done some research into and thinking about this industry and here are my startling conclusions:

1.) These dolls are smuggled into the U.S. across the Mexican border by hiding them in watermelons. They are removed from the melons in San Antonio and inflated. From SAT, they are moved by Greyhound into the major cities of the U.S. This industry is run by the N. Korean mafia with help from arab terror organizations who supply venture capital. The goal is to make American males dependent upon the high quality sex which they can't get from American females. A secondary goal is to take jobs from American females who would love to have the jobs the dolls fill.

2.) The U.S. government and various vigilante groups have concentrated so hard upon stopping undocumented border crossers, that they have completely overlooked this dangerous phenomenon. This presents an opportunity for civic minded individuals in major American cities. They would be doing everyone a favor if they would check all sex providers and determine whether or not the providers are flesh and blood providers or in fact plastic blow up providers.

3.) If you prefer unshaven pussy, you are encouraged to carry a sterilized merkin or other form of cod piece with you. The vendor considered making hairy snatch the default but decided that this could be dangerous. A person who decided to shave the hirsute pussy of a doll would risk injury to themselves if the doll were to explode catastrophically.

Stand by for other revelations as this story develops.

LexLuther

Sleazebum

12-31-06, 15:59

http://www.realdoll.com/

Can order it WITH a bush too!

JJ

Jake Jj 1492

12-31-06, 19:09

Obviously this is the real sex slave trade that the government was trying to crack down on. As these real dolls are so authentic looking and near perfect, they could easily mistake our local AMP girls for these dolls.

Too bad, since even the RealDolls are consenting adults (this could be a point of argument I'm sure) but they missed their mark trying to crack down on our local massuesses.

RealDolls are people too! Just because they don't have green cards or speak very good english (well I don't think they speak at all, at least without a lawyer present) shouldn't deny them rights!

Happy New Year folks.

Drew Park

12-31-06, 19:15

http://www.realdoll.com/

Can order it WITH a bush too!

JJ

But the French ones come with hairy legs and armpits...standard!

LoveLOS

01-01-07, 01:06

Let me be the first monger to wish many of you happy fucking new year!

For those making resolutions, may I suggest a solution to broken ones: Do not make the kind that require willpower or socially respectable behavior to fullfill e.g. quitting some bad habit like drinking or mongering. It won't work.

I resolve to have sex with as many women as I can, as often as I can. Now that is a resolution I may be able to keep...

Well, LoveLOST:
I've got me car issues, Bench has got $ issues. I've got some extra money, Bench can fix cars. Maybe we could put our bald heads together and....

make an ass of ourselves.
LL, what do you say we meet up at the last place we saw each other and have ourselves a little flesh for fantasy party? You know I'm bringing my goodie bag and a bottle of Julio - hell, I may even bring a copy of my nominated submission to the academy so we have something to watch while we're resting between heart attacks.That's it. Enough already. I am convinced!!!!

Let's have a RT!

Actually BSR drew some mental pictures for me--he is quite creative in his deprvity. Therefore we have gotten our bald heads together and sketched out some plans. We have a date in mind, just not a time or location...yet. Yes, it includes a lot of flesh and the realization of several fantasies. The reports from the Amp closing RT were deleted (presumably by accident), but it may be because it really was over the edge. Those in attendance will either be scarred for life, or will have memories of an all out orgy that will persist until dementia robs us of even those pleasures. Can we top that one?

Hint: Follow LL's lead and sample all the ladies at the RT.

Another resolution I think I can keep. I just hope we can hold out until the RT... Doubt it. Are we there yet?

Trusted ones can PM me or Bench for the date (late in the month) and let's put our bald heads together and make this a RT to remember.

LL

Lex -- that is fucking hilarious

Pcpc1688

01-01-07, 02:37

LL, Bench,

Is that a prerequsite for the RT? LOL or some hair is ok?

PC out

Saiyen

01-01-07, 15:48

Happy New Years fellow mongers. Can a brotha that has started to loose his hair and gets it cut real short to hide the upcoming baldness join. Or is this purely a shiny head, no pun intended meet up.

LOL

Oh and FYI Fincar can be prescribed by your doctor to slow the baldness process. Funny thing I read up on it on a mens hair loss message board.
Thank you internet. Hehe.

My New Years resolution is definitely to take better care of myself like working out. And since i'm such a lard ass I always work up a sweat mongering with those tiny petite fit korean girls ;)

Let me be the first monger to wish many of you happy fucking new year!

For those making resolutions, may I suggest a solution to broken ones: Do not make the kind that require willpower or socially respectable behavior to fullfill e.g. quitting some bad habit like drinking or mongering. It won't work.

I resolve to have sex with as many women as I can, as often as I can. Now that is a resolution I may be able to keep...

That's it. Enough already. I am convinced!!!!

Let's have a RT!

Actually BSR drew some mental pictures for me--he is quite creative in his deprvity. Therefore we have gotten our bald heads together and sketched out some plans. We have a date in mind, just not a time or location...yet. Yes, it includes a lot of flesh and the realization of several fantasies. The reports from the Amp closing RT were deleted (presumably by accident), but it may be because it really was over the edge. Those in attendance will either be scarred for life, or will have memories of an all out orgy that will persist until dementia robs us of even those pleasures. Can we top that one?

Hint: Follow LL's lead and sample all the ladies at the RT.

Another resolution I think I can keep. I just hope we can hold out until the RT... Doubt it. Are we there yet?

Trusted ones can PM me or Bench for the date (late in the month) and let's put our bald heads together and make this a RT to remember.

LL

Lex -- that is fucking hilarious

Benchseats Rock

01-01-07, 21:59

But don't you think some of these spa videos would be circulating out there if this was a common practice?

How's this for circulation?

www.ama10.com

Junky11

01-01-07, 22:28

But the French ones come with hairy legs and armpits...standard!

RealDoll + ASIMO = HOBOTS

Broome333

01-01-07, 23:05

I may have a chance to visit the DC area later this year and of course did some research on the thread to see what was going on in the AMPs. The idea of ending up on the internet in a video has dampened my enthusiasm a little. I have heard rumors of other places that may or may not be recording both audio and video, but never paid it much mind. Of course I suppose I can take comfort in the fact that I am so ugly that no one in their right mind would pay to watch a porn video starring me. Sounds like quite a racket they had going though. Anyone willing to PM me with some info to use on my visit?

LexLuther

01-01-07, 23:17

Broome333,

Do your research on this site. Select one. Call and make sure it's open. When you get there ask about cameras, perhaps telling them the story. Pick a lively girl with a smile on her face. Doesn't have to be the best looking girl in the place.

Ask her for her name and tell her yours. Use her name several times and commit it to memory. Tell her you think she's special and that you'll be back to see her.

Be clean when you arrive and take another shower if it's offered. This way the girl will know you are really clean. It also helps to form a bond and to show her that cleanliness is as important to you as it is to her. Try to be pleasant if you can. You could even offer a small gift to mamasan and the woker whom you draw. Put your generous but reasonable tip on the nightstand under your watch.

Once the lady gets started, let her know what you like. When the finale has started, be kind and gentle, concerned with the girl's comfort and safety. Tell her this is the best experience you have had in a while.

If you feel you have been shorted, complain to the mamasan on your way out.

LexLuther

HotFootTeddy

01-02-07, 17:40

I figured there was a glut of information about other establishments and decided to contribute something new by going to IHC. Went by late afternoon on Friday and drew Sophia. She's thin, 5'6"ish, natural healthy B's, long black hair, and mid 30's. Found out later she's half Korean and half Chinese (I think that's what she said). Looks were a solid 7 in all categories (maybe a little higher in the face) for me.

OK TS, pretty good massage, was open to the works although I've recently been having issues making it through the whole event due to getting too damn worked up.

I didn't experience anything above and beyond, but she was very eager to please, and provided a very enjoyable session. Standard fees applied.

Saw 1 other provider at the place when we were walking around - that one was similar height and skinny with larger cups, but not as pretty. Didn't get her name

Only odd thing about the experience, was that I wasn't asked for the house fee until after the shower back in the room - that was new. This was also the first place with the little valuable bag and shower slippers.

PM for any more info if necessary - but don't ask for directions or location. If I can find it so can you.

LoveLOS

01-02-07, 19:58

I figured there was a glut of information about other establishments and decided to contribute something new by going to IHC...
<clipped>
PM for any more info if necessary - but don't ask for directions or location. If I can find it so can you.

Welcome to the DC board! The above is the kind of post I like to see--going to a new spa SO THAT he can contribute something that is lacking. What a concept!

Keep em wet & keep the reports cumming!
LoveLOS

Rejected Monke

01-02-07, 20:45

I'm just curious. What's the "worst" thing you've done to an AMP girl?

For me, I was having trouble "finishing" and after 45 minutes, the AMP girl told me I had to go. Now I didn't really say anything directly, but I kept making these big sighs like a jackass and kept hinting at it, "But I came to finish....". She then told me she'd give me back my money minus the house fee.

Afterwards, I kind of felt bad, and after reading posts about some of the crappy things and people these girls have to put up with, I don't think I'd ever take my money back again if I've already been "inside" someone, whether I finish or not.

Pcpc1688

01-02-07, 21:28

Hi All,

I thought I would add to LL's theory of writing about those Kgirls. LOL

Went to this fine establishment yesterday and had a little cutie Lily or Coc or Mikie or whatever they are using that day. Started nicely cause she was the perfect 5' little schoolgirl that you wanted to look up her plaid Catholic skirt. Heheh

Ok ts, but in the room is where it happened. She had such a nice bod. Little smokin B cups and nicely trimmed too. Tastes so good and the AR that I gave her made my dick hard. On to the sweet little, tight pussy and I could not stop sweating. Whew

She was so wet. Damn. I going back for 2nds tomorrow. She sucked me off to finish and the girl didnt let up till it was bone dry.

$1.6 total damage and I got out in 1.2 hours. Nice. PM me for any more details if you like.

PC out

Benchseats Rock

01-03-07, 09:15

Of course I suppose I can take comfort in the fact that I am so ugly that no one in their right mind would pay to watch a porn video starring me.
You've watched porn with Ron Jeremy, right? Nuff said. :)
I have heard rumors of other places that may or may not be recording both audio and video, but never paid it much mind.
This happened in Chicago, so whether or not it that means anything other than shit like this happens, I don't know. But it ain't no rumour... that much is for sure.

Too candid camera
Cops say spa's hidden cameras may have broadcast sex acts over the Internet

December 27, 2006
BY ANNIE SWEENEY Crime Reporter
Patrons of a Northwest Side massage parlor may have had their visits with prostitutes broadcast over the Internet, police said.

Based on statements from a woman who worked there and the sophistication of computer equipment seized from V.I.P. Salon & Day Spa, police believe sex acts might have been transmitted from small, curtained cubicles onto the Web, said Jefferson Park District Cmdr. Ralph Price.

Officers found tiny cameras mounted in the ceiling of several rooms at V.I.P.

"It's gone beyond just prostitution," Price said. "What you think may be private could be all over the place."

Investigators with the Vice Control Section said they had not heard of any similar computer set-up at other places of prostitution in the city.

"Really, this is kind of unchartered territory for us," said Lt. Paul Kusinski.

Price said the V.I.P. Salon at 4422 N. Milwaukee -- where customers have to be buzzed in -- has been a longtime problem for the neighborhood.

Chicago vice officers have raided the business seven or eight times over the past 18 months, and the city has filed complaints against the business, police said. The landlord of the business also filed a lawsuit in January 2006 seeking to evict the business owner, according to Cook County records.

The owner could not be reached for comment.

Charges stemming from the police raids were typically never more than misdemeanors. But now Chicago Police and the Cook County state's attorney's office are seeking more serious charges against the owner and manager for the alleged unlawful videotaping.

Price -- who has done premise checks himself on the business because of complaints -- said he hopes this latest raid will rid the neighborhood of V.I.P. for good.

"Finally, we can shut this guy down," Price said. "This could be the nail in the coffin."

Price's officers got their break on Dec. 20 when someone placed a 911 call to report that a woman at the business was screaming.

When officers arrived, a sergeant pulled back a curtain on two cubicles to find men having sex with women. But officers then spotted something else -- a pinhole camera in the ceiling.

"We followed all the wires," Price said. "They all went to a central computer."

Real money online: female suspect
One of the women arrested told police they charged the men for sex acts, but the real money was made from the share of profits from broadcasting on the Internet, Price said.

The officers obtained a search warrant, which was executed the next morning, Price said. The computer's hard drive was seized and will be analyzed, and police photographed all the cameras and the wires leading to the server.

The raid resulted in four people being charged, including a 20-year-old man for patronizing a place of prostitution, two women -- 39 and 20 -- for solicitation and a 51-year-old man for keeping a place of prostitution.

Drew Park

01-03-07, 19:56

I'm just curious. What's the "worst" thing you've done to an AMP girl?

Outside of a surprise CIM or an unexpected trip up the back door... I cannot think of anything.

Clixxx

01-03-07, 21:15

Originally Posted by Rejected Monke
I'm just curious. What's the "worst" thing you've done to an AMP girl?

Two things and both in all seriousness -
First was more of what I did bad that started to taint (pun intended) an ongoing customer provider relationship at an AMP. Not really a bad thing to HER.
As many of us have, in the early 90s and early in the AMP phase for me, I got simply enchanted with the service of one asian girl at a spa; both shall remain nameless. I would always ask for her and often expressed my disappointment when she was not available (not poorly usually, just expressed it). I thought I was a seasoned AMP person at the time, but truly I was not. Our "friendship" was very good and we had good sessions. One time, I uttered an off the cuff remark while having fun - "I love you".
That simple utterance caught her by surprise big time and I could not believe I actually said it and retracted it immediately. It was an expression meant to convey how much I enjoyed my sessions with her. From that point forward it seemed to be that I was on a radar screen of "crossing the line" or perhaps going to postal or psycho. Not realy sure. She increased her deferral of serving me, even when I called for appointments, over time although I still would get her from time to time. I learned then that no matter what, remember this is pay for pussy and business for her. Crossing the line could be dangerous for her (and detrimental to me).

Second thiing, and somewhat related, was with the same lady at the same AMP. I came in one night and told her I wanted to fuck her. Now this is not a FS AMP but she let me and god it was great. Well, I had recently gotten married. I had gotten a strange discoloration on my pecker head about two weeks following the encounter with the AMP girl. My ex wife got some issues to. We went to a urologist who pronounced that I had a form of genital warts (HPV) and gave me some shit to put on my dick. The discoloration never completely went away, but faded in and out. My ex got HPV on her pap smear and the worst kind of of the hundred plus virus that make up the HPV group.

Well, I was convinced, without being armed with proper knowledge, that I caught the HPV from the AMP girl. What did I do, I posted it on an open board....it may have been this one or TBD (free at that time). Needless to say I was persona non gratata the next time I walked into that spa.
After about a year of the oscillating red discoloration and itching on my dick,
I had some street action that resulted in concern that I get tested for HIV and other things. I had to go to the free clinic in the county I worked in.
Well the doc took one look at my dick and said, that monster (LOL) has a yeast infection! For a fucking year I had a yeast infection and that damn urologist got the diagnosis wrong! I have, with the assistance of this board, the web, and books educated myself on HPV etc. But I digress.

The bad thing was posting that I got something from an AMP girl when in fact I did not. I probably had the HPV since college days which goes dormant and active without, essentially , any rhyme or reason. I posted on a public board that xxxx had given me HPV. She was livid and rightfullys so. I tried apologizin in open board, well after the fact, and in person but to no avail.
I had hurt her business pure and simple on two levels - ONE I shared publicly that I got FS from her in a non FS spa, and that from it I caught something.

With the exception of commonly known FS spas (less and less these days) I rarely ever post about getting FS if I do. I dont want to compromise the girls livelyhood or my abliltiy to get puntang with a nice rub. Second, I will go to the proper doctor to get me checked out before considering an open public statement about it on a forum (if associated with a provider). If I am certain beyond a reasonable doubt that I got it from a skank pussy, I will notify the provider first. If she is not receptive and communicative about her condition, examination, and results, then I consider it fair play to advise in PMs about what I encountered and perhaps consider a more public discussion if conditions warrant.

So, I guess the baddest thing I did with an AMP outside of CIM or slipping in the backdoor like previously mentioned, is forget it is truly a business in the providers eyes (hence it is just fucking not something else) and besmerch her integrity and impact her business without having all the facts. I wont do that again.

SIDEBAR
Many a time I would go to other spas in Waldorf, Laurel, Jessup, DC etc and on infrequent occasions the girl, whom I might or might not recognize, would say to me, XXXX hates you or made sure you got crap service at this spa or with this girl. The AMP provider I offended was pretty high up on the food chain at one time. She made sure to spread her venom to others.
I guess the baddest thing I ever did to an AMP girl has been coming back to me from time to time since.

Monger on
clix

LoveLOS

01-03-07, 21:28

Clix,
Good read. I'd suggest posting a link to that one in the new "Reports of Distinction" thread! (http://www.usasexguide.info/forum/showthread.php?t=5086)

Amp Index listings:
11-09-06 Report index June 2006 to October 31, 2006
09-13-06 Post Black Wednesday AMP address list

Here is a link to most of the Index reports.

PCP,
good show.

LL

Sleazebum

01-03-07, 23:29

I can honestly say I have never knowlingly done anything bad to any AMP girl.

Even the ones who seem to dislike short, fat, white guys get all the proper grunts and groans and "This is WONDERFUL! You are WONDERFUL!" from me.

The last three have all called me "Soopaman" and gave me a kiss on the cheek as I went out the door.

Treat them as you want to be treated! Simple! A little kindness will pay off BIG TIME later!

And, sometimes, I take a gift of fruit for the girls to share.

JJ

I'm just curious. What's the "worst" thing you've done to an AMP girl?

For me, I was having trouble "finishing" and after 45 minutes, the AMP girl told me I had to go. Now I didn't really say anything directly, but I kept making these big sighs like a jackass and kept hinting at it, "But I came to finish....". She then told me she'd give me back my money minus the house fee.

Afterwards, I kind of felt bad, and after reading posts about some of the crappy things and people these girls have to put up with, I don't think I'd ever take my money back again if I've already been "inside" someone, whether I finish or not.

Saiyen

01-03-07, 23:47

WTF? I'm short tan an fat and working on losing my hair. I really believed I was the only Soopaman..*sigh*

j/k

Yeah Sleazebum I tend to be very sweet with them as well and overall experience has been GREAT!

Quick question as for the gift of fruit is it a fruit basket or just a bag of oranges? I have never done this but would like to just am not sure what type of response to expect.

I can honestly say I have never knowlingly done anything bad to any AMP girl.

Even the ones who seem to dislike short, fat, white guys get all the proper grunts and groans and "This is WONDERFUL! You are WONDERFUL!" from me.

The last three have all called me "Soopaman" and gave me a kiss on the cheek as I went out the door.

Treat them as you want to be treated! Simple! A little kindness will pay off BIG TIME later!

And, sometimes, I take a gift of fruit for the girls to share.

JJ

Pcpc1688

01-04-07, 01:42

The worst is not tipping them, however with just cause only. LOL

Or leaving them a Jackson like a SW. HEHE Only justified of course.

Becoming their boyfriend. Ahhh Oh shit.

Becoming their Sugar Dadddy, Daddy can I borrow $5k? LOL

Not fucking them on the rag, ya know they are so hornt then. But nothing the good pld sponge cant take care of. K girls rarely ever take off, only when they want to blow a few grand in AC.

This isnt a poct of worst but all comments are true to the T.

PC out

Friendly1

01-04-07, 02:58

Like Otis Redding used to sing: Try a Little Tenderness.

Sleazebum

01-04-07, 17:34

I just stop off somewhere and get a bag or box of clementines or oranges for them.

Doesn't cost much and they seem to really appreciate the thought.

Or - get something else they can all share to eat.

JJ

WTF? I'm short tan an fat and working on losing my hair. I really believed I was the only Soopaman..*sigh*

j/k

Yeah Sleazebum I tend to be very sweet with them as well and overall experience has been GREAT!

Quick question as for the gift of fruit is it a fruit basket or just a bag of oranges? I have never done this but would like to just am not sure what type of response to expect.

Sushi Boy

01-04-07, 17:38

Went to H&H this afternoon, met with Sandra (never been with her before, since she usually works nights) 5'4" slightly overweight, small C-B cup, 35-40 yrs old. She said she was born in Italy and raised in Uruguay.

Fair massage, DATY, bbbj no cim, .8 tip

Drew Park

01-04-07, 18:53

I just stop off somewhere and get a bag or box of clementines or oranges for them. Doesn't cost much and they seem to really appreciate the thought. Or - get something else they can all share to eat.

In another town and in another time I was a regular at Tampa spa. This place didn't open until early afternoon on Sundays. I asked why and the girls told me that on Sunday they would often go to a Westshore Ave restaurant for brunch. Since that was the only time they really had "off" when they were working, they liked doing that.

Well, the light bulb came on in my big head (as well as in my little head) and I offered to treat the girls to brunch next time they wanted to go. They agreed! I was their hero.

But before we could make that happen, LE made one of their "inspections" and in the wake of that several of the girls quickly left town as they didn't have the required licenses.

Oh well...

CabDriver52

01-04-07, 19:50

The worst thing I have done. Takes some thought for sure. Probably would be bad gas. I had been away for several months and decided my yellow fever needed some attention. Well I had forgotten I had ice cream after lunch that day. Ice cream (I think it's the dairy. Not too sure) gives me deadly gas. Silent but very strong.

That evening I enjoyed a few beverages, had dinner, decided to ride to get the fever checked out. Well on my ride I squeesed a few out. In the shower I was trying to figure out if I could squeeze one out, silently with little fanfare. No luck. I was too relaxed. Next on to the room, she starts massaging my back and totally by accident I let one go. Well, she wasn't very happy with me at this point. We finished quickly and I left. A week or two later, I returned and apoligized to her and brought her some clememtines. She seemed happy and all was forgotten.

Too bad the place closed on black Wednesday and never reopened. Anyway, happy hunting. Be safe out there.

Cabbie

Clixxx

01-04-07, 21:42

The worst thing I have done. Takes some thought for sure. Probably would be bad gas. I had been away for several months and decided my yellow fever needed some attention. Well I had forgotten I had ice cream after lunch that day. Ice cream (I think it's the dairy. Not too sure) gives me deadly gas. Silent but very strong.

Cabbie

WHoa Cabbie, you brought the memory banks alive with that one....Heck yeah I have broken wind many a time when the girl would be walking on my back etc. Although the girls always brushed it off, it generally ruled out the potential of visit to the asian rim (since the potential that I may not be any longer clean as a whistle from the shower I suppose).

I generally always ask to hit the john before the shower hoping that all farts get out and I piss dry before all activity.

On another note, I also used to give fruit, flowers, candy, even had the flowers delivered to my favorite spas and or to my favorite lady(s) at the spa(s). Trust me, you think it currys favor but for me I dont think it gets you any further than as if you broke wind. They will talk a good game with you making you feel that what you did was appreciated, but the only thing that mattters is greenbacks.
Just my wooden nickel.

Monger on
clix

Laxman #2

01-04-07, 22:14

Cabbie and Clixxx:

Thanks for sharing that with us guys...NOT!

Now can we return to our regularly scheduled channels?

SMWSLT

Lax

Friendly1

01-05-07, 00:30

I have taken them as gifts to the spas, too. I guess we have more than mongering in common!

Bseeks

01-05-07, 13:00

Hi Guys,

Thanks for the information and research. Allow me to give my credentials up front, since Newbie slamming seems to be an art form here.

I lived in DC for about 10 years but had not discovered the spa scene until moving to Boston. Since then I make it to DC about a half dozen times a year and usually try to get some relaxation while in town. Although I have tried a few over the years, I finally settled into DT because it is near where I stay, plus I like to warm up in Archibalds. Plus, and this is a big plus, I have never been ripped off at DT. Never been ripped off anywhere, but that is a frequent concern of taking my clothes off in a foreign land. Also, I knew DT had a TS, and I love that.

More credentials. I am a strip club guy and post frequently on alt.sex.strip.clubs, including fs and other fun activities. Years ago I posted on a now defunct tampa board, and I believe that Drew Park was a regular there. Either that or I recognize his handle from *********. Got a lot of early spa recon from ********* by the way.

Anyway. Headed to Sun based on the consensus of this board. For first timers, it is a bit hard to find. It is actually slightly around the corner and there is no street number, but there is the telltale doorbell.

Walked up the stairs, ugly mamasan. Seemed to be only one therapist on duty at 10:00 pm. Couldn't tell. Her name was "Honey", naturally. Lovely girl , some english. Standard fare, standard price. TS was very attentive to all the good parts, and frankly I love that. Wish that more therapists would understand how important that is.

Back to the room, very complimentary of everything I had to offer, mediocre massage, good body to body massage, good preliminary attention to detail. Lovely FS, was over very quickly, with her in a crouch above me.

All in all, a typical good experience. I was surprised at one reviewer who said they had fixed the place up. Seemed pretty dingy to me. I actually would love to find someplace that actually was clean and bright and modern and looked legit. There was a nonasian place near boston that tried to look legit (Matrix), but no TS. One other comment. She disappeared with the donation for something like 5 minutes or more. Kind of killed a lot of the build up she had worked so hard on (heh heh, he said hard on).

Thanks guys.

Laxman #2

01-05-07, 16:32

Hi Guys,

Thanks for the information and research. Allow me to give my credentials up front, since Newbie slamming seems to be an art form here.

We only slam newb who do not contribute and ask dumb questions that could be answered by RTFF. You have obviously done your homework and gained the benfit of the collective intel of this board. Good first effort!

Welcome to the DC board!

Lax

LoveLOS

01-05-07, 17:37

Thanks for the information and research. Allow me to give my credentials up front, since Newbie slamming seems to be an art form here.
ROTFLMAO,

You have got a point. NoVa, DC and Balmer have developed the keyboard as an effective replacemnt for the sword like few other boards. The good news is we generally only pick on newbies who are uable to read, think they superior to the lowlives that haunt this mansion, or those who get all bent out of shape if someone does fuck with them on a "virtual" basis.

OTOH, your first post, being an excellent trip report, adding accurate details, and acknowedging proper use of the forum (you read it) garners the opposite reation: WELCOME to DC, please feel free to play in the sandbox anytime!

Honey is a hard-workin little bee...

Trip report Part 1:

BB doesn't post, but his "fictional" presence as LL's wingman is pretty famous. Another running mate may actually sign up RSN. We have selected his screen to be something like Field Tech. FT has been around for a while, mostly on the sidelines, but a notable fluke is he was present at Trashman's retirement party, so he is inner circle by default...

A local boys-night-out and we got to talkin about our favorite subject. Then we got to thinking we could pull this off. And a wild hair later, we are on the road north. Readers must understand the characters here is historical context. LL is an absolute PIG when it comes to drinking, partying, and fucking women. While those with me generally have a hell of a good time, there are times when BB has gotten the short end of the stick:
BB gets sleeping beauty while LL scores Uber-Waif
Nogales, when BB took one for the team - Cloaudia
Atlanta, LL got the pick of the AMP
LL gets served his ATF, BB gets a hottie pulled from him
The rat bastard remineded me of all of these "incidents" while driving up. He had also drawn designated driver staus on this evening, so I think he was just bitchin... But he still had his heart set on Bebe LoveLOS and since friendship is thicker than pussy juice, I told mamasan to serve my man my fave girl. That was hard, but my concience is clear.

Bebe was there, but Miko and Young are gone. FT drew Honey and reported high marks. Two new girls replacing Young and Miko are Gina and Lily. Gina is young and very very hot looking, small tits. Look is all LL could do, he drew Lily. Lily is somewhere in her thirties, at least I think, and her body is quite exquisite. Tall with dark hair, nips that stick out on B cups, flat tummy, small tight looking ass and neatly trimmed snatch.

She didn't take to LL at all, and seemed nervous about him in the room waiting for the TS. Finally she asked mamasan about LL and came bouncing back into the shower room singing to herself "he issss Ohhh Kay..." I had to laugh, but things did improve.

Still, she had a routine, and would not could not vary from it. No DATY, no breast fest... She administered the treatment and LL was really not allowed to play any reindeer games... A finger up the ass during reverse CG did solve get her job done, or so she must have thought. She seemed not to want to do the massage and took a break before she got around to that. Massage was OK. She was able to read LL was not completely satisfied and apologized profusely. As I said, YMMV, but I didn't have a lot of fun and with the quality of the rest of the stable, I won't repeat.

Lars data:
Face 7
Body 8
TS 7
'tude 5
Sex 5
Overall Lars 5
Please note an AMP newbie would probably rate this one a lot higher. YMMV but this one did not do it for LL. It occurs to me a contributing factor to my less than great experience is the brooding knowledge that BB was having his way with my girl...

Round two is required. We took a break at TBWNN

Part II:

Refreshed from our break, the twin pigs BB and LL wanted more kimchi. FT dropped out of play for lack of funds. We were ensconced into the kitchen while waiting for our requested ladies. BB had reported wonderful things in his first round, and LL needed to refocus Bebe on who she loves most... :p And BB was energized by FT's wonderful comments about Honey, as well as LL's fanatsy fullfilled, in part by Honey and chose that dish.

Niether hog was dissapointed.

Bebe was pleased with my Korean language studies, thanks to Sarang Haeyo for his choice of screen name. She really bounced when I confirmed her ATF status... Our escapades are definately YMMV status by this time, suffice to say the wedding will be soon and BB wants to be best man.

Lars data:
Face 8
Body 9+
TS 9
'tude 10
Sex 11
Overall: Private stock keeper.

BB and LL melted back down the stairs, collected our Field Technician from the streets of Chinatown and journeyed back to the land of Virgins, completely contented.

LoveLOS

Drew Park

01-05-07, 19:09

Years ago I posted on a now defunct tampa board, and I believe that Drew Park was a regular there. Either that or I recognize his handle from *********. Got a lot of early spa recon from ********* by the way.

Yep, it's me! The one and only. My company moved me from Tampa to DC two years ago. Feel free to PM me, if you like...

Drew

Laxman #2

01-05-07, 20:19

Loop Vet

01-05-07, 22:38

2 – I wouldn’t f**k her with ****’s dick

there are five *'s in Robux.

LoveLOS

01-06-07, 18:16

2 – I wouldn’t f**k her with ****’s dick

there are five *'s in Robux.

While there are four *'s in "Loop", you may be right about that anyway--Robie is about the only guy I know who would fuck a "2" with his own dick...

LL

Big Red50

01-06-07, 19:56

Recently LoveLOS and others on this board have posted on AMP providers and experiences and given LARS™ ratings. In the interest of giving newer members a heads up, the following is reposted.

Originally Posted by Laxman #2
With the Winter Olympics upon us, it strikes me that we need to address the problem of subjective scoring. I would like to propose a standard scoring system for the DC AMP scene that I have named the Lax AMP Rating System (“LARS”™) as follows:

0 – I’m going to slit my wrists
1 – Worst ever
2 – I wouldn’t f**k her with ****’s dick
3 – Really bad
4 – Not recommended, avoid
5 – Adequate, standard fare
6 – Good, above average
7 – Superior
8 – Highly recommended, must see
9 – OMFG, best ever
10 – So good I’m keeping this one for myself

Peace and love

LaxHey Laxman great work:

I also proposed a Big Red SW Looks Rating System.

I have re-printed a portion of that post from 12/5/06.and 1/3/07.

Listed below are samples of stats and several questions for the learned senior members. Or am I making this to complicate. After several years of mongering they all seem to run together, except those exceptional ladies that mind f**k you so you never forget!

Sample Stats
Looks/body/attitude/service
8/9/9/8

Question for senior members:
• Should we standardize statistics, for escorts and SW?
• Should the evaluation criterion be different for escorts and SW?
• Should there be standards for points given? For example:

Now Laxman your excellent LARS™ ratings, in my Professional Mongering opinion, falls in the overall service category.

Big Red’s SW Looks Rating System:

1. Fugly no teeth, hair or skin, scabs only
2. Robux or Curtis Bay Ugly don’t let your friend f**k her
3. Regular ugly not f**ckable unless stoned
4. Minor ugly ok to f**k if drunk
5. Average ok to f**k any time (this is where Big Red tries to draw the line)
6. Pretty and well groomed
7. Attractive face and appearance
8. Hot and sexy looking
9. Model Material
10. Goddess perfect in every way

First let me state I have never picked up a 10 SW so don’t worry about that one. I usually try to set the bar at a five; however in the past when my judgment was compromised, by alcohol or controlled substances I have woken up with 3’s and 4’s much to my own chagrin. Typically we judge people by our own standards; so here goes:

If they are Robux ugly they must be a 2 for Robux to pass, I picked up a 2 at a bar once, she was so excited to have a drunk man of my caliber, she was dragging me out of the bar to have her way with me. I was saved by a friend who did not have beer goggles or mongervision. Since I have never sunken to a 2, It is conjecture on my part that Robux, the fine gentleman(I use that term loosely) that he is applies a similar standard.

Just trying to set the bar

Big Red

As a less complicated alternate I have re-posted a portion of Oriole Mon’s post from 1/3/07

My scale is quite simple when mongering:

N - No good
Y - Pick up, get some, drop off

Junky11

01-06-07, 22:01

Yep, it's me! The one and only. My company moved me from Tampa to DC two years ago. Feel free to PM me, if you like...

Drew

YOu ever get laid in one of those famous Tampa strip clubs?

Pcpc1688

01-06-07, 23:11

Drew Park

01-07-07, 08:25

YOu ever get laid in one of those famous Tampa strip clubs?

Yes. PM for details. But it doesn't matter since a lot has changed since then.

Sooner1

01-07-07, 14:35

My second daydream about supra allowed me to meet Jenny.

Jenny was not as pretty as Seven in my last dream, but very cute nonetheless. She had a rockin body with no flab, tremendous natural perky titties, nice firm tight ass, and neatly trimmed landing strip.

Started with an average table shower, then on to a decent massage (with roaming hands around the taint and ass). I then requested AR, she obliged ( I don't care if it's a finger pretending to be the tongue it feels damn good). Then on to CBJ, 69, DATY (tremendous juicy vagine with lots of great moaning sounds)... I got some AR in on her as well, then mish with a lot of titty sucking and a fantastic finish where she faked orgasm.

Afteword some nice cuddling, she gave me three ZRBTTs on the belly button, sucked my nipples a bit and massaged my chest arms and feet. The typical hot towels followed, I also got a cup full of listerine to wash my mouth out. I don't know if that was a sign that I should not have done DATY, or just a courtesy, I definetly swished and gargled tho.

Jenny's personality shined throughout my dream, great talk, sounds, moaning, attitude. This is the second time I've had such great service (many years ago in Columbia, MD) and the first time I've had a dream like this from such a hott woman.

Looks/body/attitude/service
8/9/9/9

Again I am new at describing these dreams and am not ready to hand out a 10 just yet.

Happy hunting

S1

CabDriver52

01-07-07, 20:33

Hey PC.

Ever been to the VIP suite? A small gift to the mamasan has ushered me to the VIP suite lets see. 8 or 9 times. Total out of pocket. Maybe $40. The VIP usually means a few extra things.

Better/faster/longer service.

Seems everyone involved gets down to business quicker and it seems the quality goes WAY up

No waiting when the place is crazy busy.

Ever been stuck in a room for 30 min BEFORE someone comes in. For the small $$ of some fruit or other incidental, I get kicked to the front of the line less constraints on time.

Pace is a little more relaxed.

A larger room.

Enough said here. No stretching and smacking a wall with your hand a larger surface for a massage.

Just nice when group activities call for that second body nobody walking by when you're busy.

It really drives me nuts to hear people walking around in front of the room. Really kills my concentration (personal choice on this one)

It seems to break the ice for a new location as well. The question as to whether I'm LE or not IMMEDIATELY goes away if I have a gift. Works the same for visiting the inlaws (no longer have 'em), a housewarming party, visiting a friend I haven't seen in a while, etc etc.

Don't knock it until you try it.

Emetib!

Cabbie

Pcpc1688

01-07-07, 22:34

A little humor. lol

ESCORT ADVERTISEMENT AND WEBSITE DECODER.

Ultimate GFE........ Has a good imagination
I enjoy my work........A highly accomplished actress, fakes "O"s better than Meg Ryan.
Down-to-earth........Isn't high.
Energetic ........Is high.
Discreet ........Too disorganized to keep your personal information.
Outcall only ........Has a car, lives in a motel.
Incall only........Doesn't have a car, lives in a motel.
BBW...........Pick a fold, any fold.
I answer my phone ........No computer.
E-mail me only ........ No phone.
Fill out my online booking form........ You will never get an appointment, ever.
Punctual........+/- 2 hours.
Educated........5 years of high school.
Wants to spend time getting to know you........Kills as much of the hour as possible with idle chit-chat.
Appreciates tips........$200 for a no-touch dance, $300 more for FS.
Girl-next-door..........Has a face like a basset hound.
Mature.............Take her photo, add 15 years.
Classy..........Washes.
University Educated.......... Bartending School.
Sensitive..........Doesn't laugh at you to your face.
Loves meeting new people..........She needs the money.
Lingerie available..........BYO, she'll be more than happy to wear it.
Sensual..........Turns the TV off.
Referrals required..........Wants to gauge how skanky you really are.
Deposit required..........Primadonna.
Sophisticated..........Stops the action to take cell phone calls.
Blonde..........Bad dye job.
Redhead..........Wig.
Couples welcome..........At least women usually wash.
Can bring a friend..........Anything to get you off faster.
Smoker..........6 packs a day.
Non-Smoker..........2 packs a day.
Doesn't do drugs..........That happens after the session.
Face obscured on site for privacy..........Butt ugly.
Elegant Dinner Companion..........A free meal is always nice.
Tight butt..........No hips, ass looks like 14 year old boy.
B cup ..........BB's on a breadboard.
C cup..........B cup.
D cup..........C cup.
DD cup..........Fat.
115..........140.
125..........150.
135..........160.
140+..........A house.
New pics on site..........Reviewers slammed her for dated pics.
I only take 1 appointment per day..........The other 5 are just friends.
My car broke down..........She has better things to do.
My email crashed, I lost everything..........She has better things to do for the next week.
Retirement..........She met a BF who doesn't like her job.
Coming out of retirement..........She was dumped.
Holiday Specials..........Kids need winter clothes.
Light Domination..........You don't want FS? All the better.
If you seek a onetime experience, look elsewhere..........look elsewhere.
Nice apartment..........Doesn't live in a motel.
A few piercings..........Face and bod look like a pin cushion.
A few tats..........More ink than bare skin.
Very accommodating..........Speaks greek if you are less than 6", $100 extra.
Now independent............Too flaky even for the agency.
Genuine pics...........Just not of her.
34-23-34.................. 34-32-40

pc out

Jericoholic

01-07-07, 23:08

Hi Cabdriver52,

WTF is a VIP suite?

Laxman #2

01-07-07, 23:19

Benchseats Rock

01-07-07, 23:51

That is so GAY. LOL

All the girls want is something call Benjamin Franklins. Anything else is just not that important. For the fruit bearers on the board, please give us a break on this GAY thing you're doing. Before long, your going to bring them Tampax or Massengales.

PC out
What in holy hell is gay about going a little bit out of your way to be nice to someone? Treating these girls better than 99% of the guys who see them isn't exactly a dumb thing to do. Especially if you don't mind being treated better than 99% of the guys who see them. Of course the girls are there for the money, I have no illusions about that - but treating them like real people and bringing them a bag of navel oranges or tangerines is worth more than money - in fact, I'm not sure that *any* cash tip can produce the results in service and attitude that having some basic human decency does.

Benchseats Rock

Big Red50

01-08-07, 00:32

LargeRed:

I have only occasionally sampled the SW fare and I find it impossible to co-mingle a SW rating system with one for AMP girls. This is undoubtedly due to my overwhelming preference for Asian women.

One man's opinion.

LaxI agree Lax:

I was very impresed with the effort you generated for LARS, you can't compare SW, Escorts or AMP's with the same system. There are not many Asian SW unless you go to Hawaii, British Columbia, Philipines or Thailand. I did see quite a few in Amsterdam, but here on the east coast we are f**ked.

Thanks for the LARS

Big Red

LoveLOS

01-08-07, 00:59

in fact, I'm not sure that *any* cash tip can produce the results in service and attitude that having some basic human decency does.
Alright, who the fuck got hold of BSR's password?

Redman,
As one who occasionally strays across the line dividing AMPs and SWs, I guess I have solved the rating problem (in my feeble little mind) by grading on a curve.

There are many that see an Asian woman as the ultimate fucking machine. I am included in that lot (hence my handle). However, I have attempted to expand my horizons and tastes, and I have been able to effectively do so. Now the white female, the only kind I sought after as a kid, is about fourth in my taste preference--after Asian, Hispanic, and Black ladies. Go figure, but this kind of preference colors the judgement as much as mongervision, making any ratings a personal subjective thing.

AMPS, Strippers, and Escorts are IMHO, expected to be a higher calibre.
The lower tier are SWs and Craigslist girls, and I guess there is about a two point curve I give them... Except at the higher end, where I give them only 1 point to keep from handing out 10's or 11's. (SW's like Essence, Special and the infamous India are true gems) I feel we are lucky in DC, some of the finest quality SWs I have had the pleasure of sampling.

So how does it work? A "7" AMP girl would be about an "8" or "9" on the street and vice versa... I have to agree with you that a "5" on either scale is the lowest I can go when not impaired or desperate to bust a nut... Yes, a "4" in an AMP is like a "6" on the street, but with the average quality and accessability of AMP girls we have here, Atlanta, SanFran, LA, Chicago, etc; why the hell would you accept an average looking woman? Same goes for a stripper or escort, but that is significantly money driven. If I'm going to pay those prices, I expect quality. OTOH, when on those mean steets, you rarely see anything better than a "6" so you gotta take what you can get...

In a bar they serve the basic well brand until you ask for top shelf or extra reserve. In tequilla terms, you see each brand has the regular "silver" stuff, Repasado, and Anejo, and it just keeps getting better. Occasionally you see the special reserve bottles, but the shit is hard to find and very spendy. Sure wish they would label women like that, so you have a clue what you are getting into before you take them to bed...

Oh, that's what this board is for, silly me.

As always YMMV
LoveLOS

Benchseats Rock

01-08-07, 01:21

Alright, who the fuck got hold of BSR's password?

I know, I know - I worked with 9 girls from SEA pretty closely for a year or so in my last job, can't help it if I have a soft spot in my heart for them - and knowing this about myself I very rarely hit the AMP circuit, I will walk out of there with a wife if I do go with any regularity - but when I go, I always bring something nice to guarantee I'm remembered and treated well - Toblerone works nicely. So nicely I once got a recipe for marijauna chicken in addition to not regularly offered anal from a Burmese chick I used to see.

BSR

Big Red50

01-08-07, 01:37

Alright, who the fuck got hold of BSR's password?

Redman,

As one who occasionally strays across the line dividing AMPs and SWs, I guess I have solved the rating problem (in my feeble little mind) by grading on a curve.

There are many that see an Asian woman as the ultimate fucking machine. I am included in that lot (hence my handle). However, I have attempted to expand my horizons and tastes, and I have been able to effectively do so. Now the white female, the only kind I sought after as a kid, is about fourth in my taste preference--after Asian, Hispanic, and Black ladies. Go figure, but this kind of preference colors the judgement as much as mongervision, making any ratings a personal subjective thing.

AMPS, Strippers, and Escorts are IMHO, expected to be a higher calibre.
The lower tier are SWs and Craigslist girls, and I guess there is about a two point curve I give them... Except at the higher end, where I give them only 1 point to keep from handing out 10's or 11's. (SW's like Essence, Special and the infamous India are true gems) I feel we are lucky in DC, some of the finest quality SWs I have had the pleasure of sampling.

So how does it work? A "7" AMP girl would be about an "8" or "9" on the street and vice versa... I have to agree with you that a "5" on either scale is the lowest I can go when not impaired or desperate to bust a nut... Yes, a "4" in an AMP is like a "6" on the street, but with the average quality and accessability of AMP girls we have here, Atlanta, SanFran, LA, Chicago, etc; why the hell would you accept an average looking woman? Same goes for a stripper or escort, but that is significantly money driven. If I'm going to pay those prices, I expect quality. OTOH, when on those mean steets, you rarely see anything better than a "6" so you gotta take what you can get...

In a bar they serve the basic well brand until you ask for top shelf or extra reserve. In tequilla terms, you see each brand has the regular "silver" stuff, Repasado, and Anejo, and it just keeps getting better. Occasionally you see the special reserve bottles, but the shit is hard to find and very spendy. Sure wish they would label women like that, so you have a clue what you are getting into before you take them to bed...

Oh, that's what this board is for, silly me.

As always YMMV

LoveLOSHey LL,

I think you have the AMP/SW handicapping system down. Of course the Oriole Man Y/N system is simple and can probably be used drunk or stoned.

I am with you and not sure exactly why white females are lower on my list, could be marriage to one for 20 years, breeds complacency. I have had many Asian civilians, and SW in the 70’s and they really did not rock my world, different time different place.

Right now my preference is Hispanic, Black, White and Asian, I have not been to an AMP in years, perhaps it is time to visit. I know how to cure monger fever and a Hispanic/Black Booty attack. I think I need a yellow fever cure.

Does it really run sideways

Big Red

PussProwler

01-08-07, 03:37

In the interest of research, and satisfying my own curiosity, I daydreamed I visited MiniSpa again.

The door was open this time. I was sat in the waiting room for 30 seconds. I was presented with Sofia. I asked for another provider, but was told 'we are very busy now'

I wasn't thrilled but went with it because I didn't want to drive across town. Standard TS, but no thorough rectal scrub. You can imagine what that didn't lead to.

Sofia is 5'4, maybe 110#. K-girl / HK mix.
Face 6
Bod 6 too thin for me, soft a cups, no ass, but long gummybears which work for me
Rub and Service was a 7
Attitute was an 8.

Very enthusiastic french lession followed by a very tight ride in several positions. I would take it or leave it. Based on service I would repeat. Based on attraction I won't. YMMV.

PP

Pcpc1688

01-08-07, 04:12

What in holy hell is gay about going a little bit out of your way to be nice to someone? Treating these girls better than 99% of the guys who see them isn't exactly a dumb thing to do. Especially if you don't mind being treated better than 99% of the guys who see them. Of course the girls are there for the money, I have no illusions about that - but treating them like real people and bringing them a bag of navel oranges or tangerines is worth more than money - in fact, I'm not sure that *any* cash tip can produce the results in service and attitude that having some basic human decency does.

Benchseats RockWell in all fairness, I did get the response I was looking for however it wasnt meant to seem like Im a cold and heartless person. I know the game well and I know what they really like, and thays Ben Franklins to send the the motherland.

PC out

VanDriver

01-08-07, 10:23

Laxman #2

01-08-07, 10:25

I have to respectfully disagree with my learned colleague LL. While I share his preference for asian and hispanic women, in my view there is no way that SW and AMP girls get rated on the same scale. They are completely different categories.

Question: How would you rate the former Maya from DT if you saw her hanging out on the stroll at 3 AM? Talk about a traffic jam!

Lax

Odysseus 46

01-08-07, 18:58

I think that's reasonably good creative writing there. When he wrote "gummybears," in my mind's eye I saw long, suckable nipples.
Was I wrong?

O 46

Drew Park

01-08-07, 19:36

How would you rate the former Maya from DT if you saw her hanging out on the stroll at 3 AM? Talk about a traffic jam!

Nah, just a few dozen rear-end collisions and an equal number of monger whiplash!

Benchseats Rock

01-08-07, 20:48

I know the game well...

You keep saying that... is that like some sort of positive reinforcement? Because you know that shit doesn't really work - but it is kind of funny when you see people walking down the street mumbling repetitive phrases to themselves.

"I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well..."

and maybe one day you will.

Benchseats Rock

PussProwler

01-08-07, 20:51

I think that's reasonably good creative writing there. When he wrote "gummybears," in my mind's eye I saw long, suckable nipples.
Was I wrong?

O 46

That's just the analogy I was trying to craft. And chew I did! :o)

PP

LoveLOS

01-09-07, 01:04

Puss,
ROTFLMFAO! I love the gummys analogy.

Looks like Bench got his S.O. off the keyboard.

Question: How would you rate the former Maya from DT if you saw her hanging out on the stroll at 3 AM? Talk about a traffic jam!

LaxThe only reason I put SWs on the same scale, albiet graded on a curve, is to keep from admitting I'd fuck a 3 on the Lax AMP Rating System (“LARS”™) scale. :D

Maya is pretty much one of those rare 10's as an AMP girl, so she would have to draw an 11 if I were cruising Vermont/K St. when the AMP closed... She probably is the most beautiful woman I have been with. If she were on the stroll, then LAX would probably start doing SWs right then and there...

Right now my preference is Hispanic, Black, White and Asian, I have not been to an AMP in years, perhaps it is time to visit. I know how to cure monger fever and a Hispanic/Black Booty attack. I think I need a yellow fever cure.

Does it really run sideways
It only runs sideways when she is sitting on you in some funky ass position. I think the sideways thing got started cause them Asian pussies are so much tighter, harder to get the ole shlong in there sometimes...

Check your PM.

LL

Pcpc1688

01-09-07, 04:08

You keep saying that... is that like some sort of positive reinforcement? Because you know that shit doesn't really work - but it is kind of funny when you see people walking down the street mumbling repetitive phrases to themselves.

"I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well, I know the game well..."

And maybe one day you will.

Benchseats RockBox,

Why are you beating me up so bad? I am entitled to my opinions as you are yours. Please stop preaching and patronizing me.

Thanks,

PC

Sarang Haeyo

01-09-07, 08:37

I think that's reasonably good creative writing there. When he wrote "gummybears," in my mind's eye I saw long, suckable nipples.
Was I wrong?

O 46
The "gummybears" came after the reference to her ass. My first thought was hemorrhoids; but hey, that's me.

Laxman #2

01-09-07, 09:41

Maya is pretty much one of those rare 10's as an AMP girl, so she would have to draw an 11 if I were cruising Vermont/K St. when the AMP closed... She probably is the most beautiful woman I have been with. If she were on the stroll, then LAX would probably start doing SWs right then and there..

That would be a correct assumption on your part my friend ;) Although the most enchanting woman in my book was Bebe who briefly graced us at Sun maybe two years ago now. Angel wasn't hard to look at either :D

Visited Sun the other day after calling ahead for an appointment with Honey. All the letters of the alphabet were on the menu and it was just what the doctored ordered to cure my yellow fever.

Honey LARS Rating:

Face 8
Body 8.5
Attitude 9
Service 9

SMWSLT

Lax

DrummerBoy

01-09-07, 11:13

The "gummybears" came after the reference to her ass. My first thought was hemorrhoids; but hey, that's me.

Dang, you painted a pretty bad picture there S.H. My sick and feeble mind cannot take that gross stuff LOL

on a comparison note.. AMPS in DC are still a good bargain compared to Howard County. According to my friend who happens to be a Howard County AMP owner, the owners have got together and are now charging $70 for 45 minutes even though they advertise and hour. The 45minutes will be shortened to 20 minutes when busy. Table Showers are going to be a thing of the past as many of them have been forcibly removed by HoCo inspectors!
Think about it...you give your own stand up shower, most of the time your shortened time will be 20 mins instead of an hr, and they are all older providers in their 40's and 50's. HOCO or DC...let me see...I think DC!

Benchseats Rock

01-09-07, 13:40

Box,

Why are you beating me up so bad? I am entitled to my opinions as you are yours. Please stop preaching and patronizing me.

Thanks,

PC

For starters, you're a noobie who calls me Box Springs Squeak - unless LL told you to, but he didn't.

You're entitled to your opinion to be sure, but that doesn't mean you're right.
As for preaching, it comes naturally - as for patronizing you, as far as I am aware, I've never given you so much as a dollar. Ohhhh, you meant the other way.... um, about that... I'm afraid the answer is no.

Good solid reporting and respect for other members and people; these are the ways to get me off your back.

Benchseats Rock

Any Mouse

01-09-07, 14:25

Eye Bar is not open. Phone not answered. Sign on door says "Construction Check back 15 Jan". Noises behind door. Sign last week said check back 8 Jan. Oh well. Wish they would put the sign someplace other than at the top of 4 flights of stairs!

On a better note, 1333 is up and well. Short but sweet time with May. Her rating:

Face 7
Body 8
Attitude 8
Service 8 -- Only for the short duration.

Big Red50

01-09-07, 14:37

Double Nickle

01-09-07, 16:46

That is so GAY. LOL

All the girls want is something call Benjamin Franklins. Anything else is just not that important. For the fruit bearers on the board, please give us a break on this GAY thing you're doing. Before long, your going to bring them Tampax or Massengales.

PC outSome of us may not be macho men super studs, especially the superannuated ones. Some of us may like it when the K-girls chew our nipples and do FUTB. But Jackson makes it OK for us to be like that without having our masculinity questioned or our gender orientation stated wrongly.

No Flaming: Please do not post any messages that harrass, insult, belittle, threaten or flame another member.

SPAM Spam is defined as postings to the Forum that are contrary to the purpose of the site, including:

Homosexual Messages
Personal Insults & Attacks
Hate Messages
General BS With that said, some of your posts have been quite good. I hope you will continue to post and even continue the humor. But be careful. BSR has inherited TM's crusade against uppity newbies. In time you may be admitted to Olympus where thunderbolts are tossed back and forth with relative impunity.

What is 1688 besides the year of the Siege of Londonderry, Ireland?

Pax (latin for peace), Double Nickle

Benchseats Rock

01-09-07, 22:21

PussProwler

01-09-07, 22:30

Today I dreamed I visited Sun. Part of the dream was a nightmare...NO RUNNING WATER! Wash cloths to start and forget about any AR.

For some reason (a parking spot at 3:30 in DC) I decided to stay and indulge in Gina. Turned out to be a good decision.

Resident provider for approximately 2 weeks. She is about 5'4, slim with a square waist. However she does have nice legs, nice butt, nice natural reactive a-cups, and a very cute face (mild K-features). Engrish is decent, and she is very willing to open up about whatever I wished to talk about.

We started with a brief cleaning. The massage opened up with a lot of foot work on PPs back (always a fav). The rest of my rub included some excellent stretching, very hard massage (strong hands), and lots of chops and pops. Gina is very well trained.

The main event began with lots and lots of b2b, tongue massage, light touch etc. The flip began with some very enthusiastic french lessons with serious attention given to the feelings of PP's huevos. "we feel very happy" is what I recall hearing. We rode happily off into the sunset in several variations of RCG, which included some very nice scenery of the grand canyon and pacific rim. Too bad I forgot my camera.

At the end she proudly stated "I won!" She did win round one anyway, but I happily accept the challange to another bout. We lied around and chatted for a while until my time expired.

LARS scale ratings:

Face 8+
Bod 7
Attitude 9
Massage and Service 9

Overall an 8+ I would repeat and recommend.

Enjoy!

PP

Trav

01-10-07, 01:05

Laxman #2

01-10-07, 10:08

I used to go to DT. I believe this place is still close. Also, Washington Post does not carry any ads for DC places any more. So can anyone let me know what is available around the Verizon ctr? Or any place near the metro. Will much appreciated.

Trav:

Welcome to DC buddy! Our research team is gearing up and will have the answers and intel you seek shortly. The regulars on the DC Board are always ready to help.

Hold your breath ;)

Lax

PS: As an alternative you could read the last week to ten days of posts on this thread and I assure you you will find what you are looking for.

Ampfreq

01-10-07, 12:55

Saw Nikki at 1333 yesterday. Very nice thin body and real breasts afaik. She gave a fast TS not worthy of mentioning and after drying off. Let's put it this way, she didn't bother with formalities at all. Not even the merest consideration of a massage. Not to say that this was all business in the meanest spirit of the word. No she was more than interested in her own "successful arrival". Again and again. Needless to say a had a full-course meal. And then some. As dreams go this one was worth remembering. The rest of the visit was enjoyed by all.

I have to say that if at all possible I will be back. I highly recommend her. Not 10's across the board but easily straight 8's except for attitude. Now that was a 10.

As always YMMV.

Big Red50

01-10-07, 15:41

Cops are at Kinja and busting the place.
This is a real time report.

Forewarned is Forearmed.

Benchseats Rock

This alert has been brought to your critical attention by the Monger Information Network.Hey Bench:

Thanks for sounding the alarm.

Question if you are in the middle of something when the place gets busted:

1. Can you finish?
2. Do you get a refund of tuition?
3. Do you get a rain check?
4. Do you invoke the Clinton DC Sex Rule " I did not have sex with that Asian Women, technically by defenition?

This is multiple choice, take as long as you like to answer.

Just wondering? (I have been wondering about a lot of things lately)

Big Red from Balmer

Benchseats Rock

01-10-07, 20:02

Hey Bench:

Thanks for sounding the alarm.

Question if you are in the middle of something when the place gets busted:

1. Can you finish?
2. Do you get a refund of tuition?
3. Do you get a rain check?
4. Do you invoke the Clinton DC Sex Rule " I did not have sex with that Asian Women, technically by defenition?

This is multiple choice, take as long as you like to answer.

Just wondering? (I have been wondering about a lot of things lately)

Big Red from Balmer

This time around it went something like: get dressed quickly and pretend it's your first massage ever and you are shocked and appalled at the insinuation that there is anything untoward happening at these places. An hour or so later you get to take off the handcuffs and sign a summons to appear in court. As for a refund, YMMV depending on if it really was your first time there and if you helped or hurt the AMP in your conversations with the fuzz.

Baltimonger

01-10-07, 20:49

Asianloverma

01-10-07, 22:44

I have not been to Sun lately. What happened to my provider Mimi? Gone to another spa in DC or gone for good? The most incredible ride ever. That gal is F-ing crazy. Anyone who wants details is welcome to PM me.

Bri

Laxman #2

01-10-07, 22:57

You can stick your request where the Sun doesn't shine!

The legendary KJ visits DC, welcome my brother! How are things on the Clix loop? I recently had the pleasure of meeting brunette Rachel ;) Great hoover skills. Will repeat.

Trav:

Continue holding your breath, the research team is working on your research request. Our attention was diverted by the Prez's speech. We are now fully focused on finding you a fine AMP near the Verizon Center. Details to follow.

Lax

Pcpc1688

01-10-07, 23:24

Hey Bench:

Do I smell Napalm?

Just wondering

Big RedI give, you win Box.

I hereby send up the white flag cause pissing uphill only gets your feet wet.

I had a great trip in LA. Nice weather and all.

BTW, any of you goto AC, careful of a SW named Kerri off Tennesse Ave. She may an oral STD issue.

Peace

Pcpc1688

01-10-07, 23:29

This time around it went something like: get dressed quickly and pretend it's your first massage ever and you are shocked and appalled at the insinuation that there is anything untoward happening at these places. An hour or so later you get to take off the handcuffs and sign a summons to appear in court. As for a refund, YMMV depending on if it really was your first time there and if you helped or hurt the AMP in your conversations with the fuzz.Never go at night is a good start. Daytime is the best, girls fresh and LE still eating donuts.

PC out

BTW, Bench, I have surrendered so where do you want the flag mailed to?

Trav

01-10-07, 23:57

Continue holding your breath, the research team is working on your research request.

LaxLax - thanks for the hint - i got it! Thanks!

LoveLOS

01-11-07, 00:05

With that said, some of your posts have been quite good. I hope you will continue to post and even continue the humor. But be careful. BSR has inherited TM's crusade against uppity newbies. In time you may be admitted to Olympus where thunderbolts are tossed back and forth with relative impunity.PCP, I have to agree with the learned 10¢ man. See, I fuck with screen names all the time, which is acutally in honor of Don Trashman, so even squeeky seats doesn't complain. Stick around, keep posting, don't let the roasting get under your panties, and your time of trust and acceptance will come. Uppity is a death knell. We pick our friends in the inner circle based first on their reliability of information recieved, lack of Bullshit smelling posts, and compatible/good attitudes. We pick our friends with thought to safety and security concerns as well as someone we might like to party with and/or do something illegal with, that kind of judgement call takes time.

I used to go to DT. I believe this place is still close. Also, Washington Post does not carry any ads for DC places any more. So can anyone let me know what is available around the Verizon ctr? Or any place near the metro. Will much appreciated.Just saw the emergency text message that Lax sent me to help you find the info. I think I found it:

Follow this link (http://www.usasexguide.info/forum/showthread.php?t=3841&page=10&pp=15), then read forward until I you read this post again... You will then know where to look.

As an alternative solution, just PM Box Springs Squeek and ask him to give you the address for Kinja Spa. I hear the place is really hot right now.

LoveLOS

BTW Squeeky, I see you really did pass my post count bigtime. Worthless bastard. Hope you get out of jail soon so you can find something to fuck besides newbies :cool:

Benchseats Rock

01-11-07, 01:18

As an alternative solution, just PM Box Springs Squeek and ask him to give you the address for Kinja Spa. I hear the place is really hot right now.

BTW Squeeky, I see you really did pass my post count bigtime. Worthless bastard. Hope you get out of jail soon so you can find something to fuck besides newbies :cool:

I give out phone numbers too. :D

I am a bastard aren't I... lemme just say that you're taking it a lot better than I thought you would. As for fucking newbies, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Unless it gets posted about first...

Trav

01-11-07, 01:19

Trav,

As an alternative you could read the last week to ten days of posts on this thread and I assure you you will find what you are looking for.Thanks LAX, I got the info!

Drew Park

01-11-07, 18:34

http://www.rasmus.com/auction_detail.php?ID=125044

Lax, Robux, LL, Bench, et al - - - Here is the opportunity of a monger lifetime. Own your own nude place! Stock it with now out-of-work AMP girls; install some VIP Suites for relaxation with your favorite "dancer"; And of course, consider the perks of being owner and operator!

Just a thought.

Drew

Lucky Luciano

01-12-07, 01:42

LoveLOS

01-12-07, 03:33

Hello,

My name is Lucky Luciano. I wanted to ask a few questions. I have not "seen any action" since July, so I've been outta the loop. Is cphc still open? Can you ask for a half hour session at an amp and still get "full service"? how much does it cost for fellatio?

Thank you for your time.

You poor soul, probably have blue balls by now. I would recomend going to CHPC and finding out if they are open, then reporting back to us. If they aren't open, go someplace else and try again until you find an open place. We have addresses on this board, but I can't remember the post number, maybe you could look that one up.

You can ask for anything, but what you get is a YMMV.

Full service? Is that like sex? YMMV

Fellicia left the place before Black Wednesday. Hope she shows up somewhere else. She charged $.60

YMMV stands for Your Mileage may vary
RTFF stands for Read the Fucking Forum

Your welcome for my time, leave the money in an envelope marked "LL" at TBWNN.

Have fun,
LL

VanDriver

01-12-07, 09:20

Big Red50

01-12-07, 09:46

I give, you win Box.

I hereby send up the white flag cause pissing uphill only gets your feet wet.

I had a great trip in LA. Nice weather and all.

BTW, any of you goto AC, careful of a SW named Kerri off Tennesse Ave. She may an oral STD issue.

PeaceHey Pcpc1688,

Good move, I got flamed as a newbie by like a dozen seniors, and I capitulated and changed my ways. Discretion is the better part of valor, you can't win them all. it is much easier to go with the flow a life lesson it took me way to long to learn. You show rare newbie wisdom and courage, welcome to the Forum.

Newbie for ever

Big Red

Benchseats Rock

01-12-07, 12:15

Jake Jj 1492

01-12-07, 16:40

http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/doc/ers/261063613.html

Drew Park

01-12-07, 17:18

I am not sure how much the Roman God, Fellatio, paid for his receipt of "full service"; but, I bet it was a fair price.

"...Interestingly, the practice of fellatio was said to have been introduced by the women of Lesbos, who used to whiten their lips as though with semen..."

Pcpc1688

01-13-07, 11:36

http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/doc/ers/261063613.htmlJake,

This looks like someplace in Dtown. Call and ask as a last resort. LOL

PC out

Pcpc1688

01-13-07, 11:38

Hey Pcpc1688,

Good move, I got flamed as a newbie by like a dozen seniors, and I capitulated and changed my ways. Discretion is the better part of valor, you can't win them all. it is much easier to go with the flow a life lesson it took me way to long to learn. You show rare newbie wisdom and courage, welcome to the Forum.

Newbie for ever

Big RedHey Red,

GO with the flow is ok. In business, there is always give and take. Chking out 1333 today and my little Lilly. Yummy.

PC out

Vice Squad

01-13-07, 22:07

Hello,

My name is Lucky Luciano. I wanted to ask a few questions. I have not "seen any action" since July, so I've been outta the loop. Is cphc still open? Can you ask for a half hour session at an amp and still get "full service"? how much does it cost for fellatio?

Thank you for your time.

What's up Lucky?
I know two AMPs that are open right now that give you a great half and half... blowjob and intercourse for $160. This also comes with a table shower and massage.
OK on Wisconsin above the Video shop and a place above the Eye Bar on I street. The house fee for both places is $60 and you need to leave a solid $100 for a tip to get the works. Leave it on the table or bed before the table shower so the girl knows you are legit.

Of course, YMMV, in terms of quality of service but the $160 payout will guarantee table shower, massage, fellatio and intercourse.

Pcpc1688

01-14-07, 01:04

PCP, I have to agree with the learned 10¢ man. See, I fuck with screen names all the time, which is acutally in honor of Don Trashman, so even squeeky seats doesn't complain. Stick around, keep posting, don't let the roasting get under your panties, and your time of trust and acceptance will come. Uppity is a death knell. We pick our friends in the inner circle based first on their reliability of information recieved, lack of Bullshit smelling posts, and compatible/good attitudes. We pick our friends with thought to safety and security concerns as well as someone we might like to party with and/or do something illegal with, that kind of judgement call takes time.

Just saw the emergency text message that Lax sent me to help you find the info. I think I found it:

Follow this link (http://www.usasexguide.info/forum/showthread.php?t=3841&page=10&pp=15), then read forward until I you read this post again... You will then know where to look.

As an alternative solution, just PM Box Springs Squeek and ask him to give you the address for Kinja Spa. I hear the place is really hot right now.

LoveLOS

BTW Squeeky, I see you really did pass my post count bigtime. Worthless bastard. Hope you get out of jail soon so you can find something to fuck besides newbies :cool:LL,

Good words from you. Although I am suffering from mid life crisis, LOL, I will keep posting all my experience, strength, and hope. I pray that Swueeky wins the Oscar and RTFF for Vegas. I left some leads for him.

Peace

VanDriver

01-14-07, 01:59

What's up Lucky?
I know two AMPs that are open right now that give you a great half and half... blowjob and intercourse for $160. This also comes with a table shower and massage.
OK on Wisconsin above the Video shop and a place above the Eye Bar on I street. The house fee for both places is $60 and you need to leave a solid $100 for a tip to get the works. Leave it on the table or bed before the table shower so the girl knows you are legit.

Of course, YMMV, in terms of quality of service but the $160 payout will guarantee table shower, massage, fellatio and intercourse.

Really? Are you kidding me?

Van

Stimpson J Cat

01-14-07, 02:42

Of course, YMMV, in terms of quality of service but the $160 payout will guarantee table shower, massage, fellatio and intercourse.Be sure to put that on your Visa.

Superman06

01-14-07, 08:45

Sleazebum

01-14-07, 09:58

This is just disgraceful! Our nation's capital city tainted with such hints of prostitution!!!

What is this world coming to?!

Both of those places used to be theraputic treatment centers doing excellent work

I am crushed...saddened...

JJ

Really? Are you kidding me?

Van

Saiyen

01-14-07, 12:05

I wasn't aware people still said intercourse.

LOL

As for this funds are tight and I cant be donating anything anytime soon. Hit the bar last night (no success but did have a good time) but to much work and effort. Plus no cute Korean girls :(

VanDriver

01-14-07, 14:41

Big Red50

01-14-07, 15:14

Not sure if this is where I should post this PM, but did anybody else get this from Tom Thumbs? I have no idea what the hell he is talking about.

Van

*******************************************************
In a PM from Tom Thumbs, he wrote:

fuck it! let's just do the "BIG KAHUNA"

we'll all meet at the manassas courthouse at 10 am and we'll go into the courtroom and as soon as the judges tries to say anything other then to get a jury to make decisions
we'll arrest the judge and bring them into federal court [that's why we have federal court a place to bring the states into court] charge the judge with treason and demand they be put to deathCrystal Methamphetamine, causes Delusional Paranoia,

If you have any other questions,

Just ass hole Red

Double Nickle

01-14-07, 16:54

DC, Capitol of Whoredom

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sleazebum

This is just disgraceful! Our nation's capital city tainted with such hints of prostitution

This is where it all began, and continues to this very day.Actually, the first brothel in the lands now encompassed by the USA was in Boston, Massachusetts about 1660. However, today Bostonians go to Providence, Rhode Island for sex. DC can take pride in over 1800 Massage Parlor Reports for 2006, highest in the USA Sex Guide, I believe.

Double Nickle

LoveLOS

01-14-07, 20:41

Crystal Methamphetamine, causes Delusional Paranoia,

If you have any other questions,

Just ass hole Red
Careful of what ye ask, somebody wanting to take down the whole corrupt legal system by USING the corrupt legal system may just take you literally!!! :eek:

I know two AMPs that are open right now that give you a great half and half... blowjob and intercourse for $160. This also comes with a table shower and massage.Vice,
I know that it may be your fucking JOB to investigate houses of prostitution, but offering Lucky that advice is questionable behavior for a LEO. It is no surprise that sex is for sale in DC (we have politicians here) but it is shocking when one of 'DC's finest would post misleading information on a public internet site.

Careful out there.
LL

Lucky Luciano

01-14-07, 21:09

Thank you so much vice squad. I really appreciate it.

[Deleted by Admin]

EDITOR'S NOTE: This report was edited in accordance with the Forum's Zero Tolerance policy regarding reports containing any personal attacks or derogatory comments directed towards another Forum Member or the Forum Membership in general.

Hugh Handsoman

01-14-07, 21:33

//../,;;00000

Navy One

01-15-07, 00:24

WENT BY GOT K GIRL WITH BOLT ON'S rock hard, injected lips, acted like I was a abusing her, no enjoyment for me. No DATY on menu, when it is refused, never press the point? Very dissapointing.

Sun closed, looking forward to trying 1333/ would love anyone who knows where Happy from Sun went was my Karma be safe.

Navy One

01-15-07, 00:40

So glad you guys moved on from this topic, I wanted to recomend Beano for the latter, and as for the european Chochalet wow, I thougt a clean bod, and fresh breath was enough. I gues diversity is what makes the world spin. K-Pus. Y is what makes my world spin. Lets stick to this.

Now that Sun in gone, what is the new hot spot. Can pm if le iss a concern.

Rejected Monke

01-15-07, 03:07

Sun is gone? WTF happened?

Sarang Haeyo

01-15-07, 09:04

Not sure if this is where I should post this PM, but did anybody else get this from Tom Thumbs? I have no idea what the hell he is talking about.

Van

*******************************************************
In a PM from Tom Thumbs, he wrote:

fuck it! let's just do the "BIG KAHUNA"

we'll all meet at the manassas courthouse at 10 am and we'll go into the courtroom and as soon as the judges tries to say anything other then to get a jury to make decisions
we'll arrest the judge and bring them into federal court [that's why we have federal court a place to bring the states into court] charge the judge with treason and demand they be put to death
I have a feeling he sent this to the AMP "experts". My guess is that; in a facetious way; he feels we're upset enough to want the legal system changed as it pertains to AMPs. At the bottom of my PM from him was a list of those to whom he sent same. I promptly took a look at his posts; then promptly deleted the PM. His statements are "full of sound and fury signifying nothing". (not unlike my own)

Junky11

01-15-07, 12:08

Good history review agent 55, I actually was referring to the hoors located in the Big white building with the dome on top. I believe that is the largest brothel in this fine nation. Hj

Why do you think they call it 'congress'?

Junky11

01-15-07, 12:13

Actually, the first brothel in the lands now encompassed by the USA was in Boston, Massachusetts about 1660. However, today Bostonians go to Providence, Rhode Island for sex. DC can take pride in over 1800 Massage Parlor Reports for 2006, highest in the USA Sex Guide, I believe.

Double Nickle

Anyone ever visit Black Angus in Puerto Rico? It was over 200 years old! It was just like that place in the movie 'From Dusk till Dawn' but without the vampires. The place was shut down a few years ago by a feminist movement down there.

Laxman #2

01-15-07, 12:15

Jake Jj 1492

01-15-07, 12:59

Anyone ever visit Black Angus in Puerto Rico? It was over 200 years old! It was just like that place in the movie 'From Dusk till Dawn' but without the vampires. The place was shut down a few years ago by a feminist movement down there.Damn, that takes all the adventure out of it! Especially if Salma Hayek is there!

Drew Park

01-15-07, 13:33

Anyone ever visit Black Angus in Puerto Rico? It was over 200 years old!

Yeah, oh yeah! I will always remember those cab rides from Roosevelt Roads. Helluva place.

Jake Jj 1492

01-15-07, 21:08

Yeah, oh yeah! I will always remember those cab rides from Roosevelt Roads. Helluva place.They shut down the Black Angus, yet they let the Chupacabra run free.

PussProwler

01-15-07, 21:31

Sun is gone? WTF happened?

Seems to me they didn't pay their bills. If you look at my last report there, they didn't have any running water. I recall reading from one of you that the phones were shut off a week earlier. The place seems to be falling apart inside in most of the rooms I've seen. I suppose they were operating on borrowed time.

After my last two less than gleeming experiences there I decided to visit Supra instead of Sun. The facilities seem to be in better shape, and the three girls I saw in the hall while I was there were all top heavy.

When I arrived I was shown to a room with a play area that could benefit from more padding. I was told I will wait for 10 minutes. That was accurate, and in came Jenny 10 minutes later. She is about 5'6, d-size attachments, nice face and hair, with curves.

The TS was standard fare. Once in the room...

I'm not going into too much detail in this report. Senior members with recent meaningful posts can get the details from me if interested.

I will just say that the experience was mixed. I will repeat the location, but not the provider.

I think I will go back to Venus next time in DC. I had three good experiences during the dark days of summer.

PP

Lucky Luciano

01-15-07, 23:19

Sun's gone? NO! What the hell? First cphc and now sun! Where the hell am I gonna go? There's nothing left!

The Nub

01-16-07, 01:57

**DISCLAIMER: The following is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events or locales is entirely coincidental.***
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Nub smiled as he got dressed in an attempt to hide his disappointment. You see, his first spa experience had just turned out to be far less than he had expected. Just 1 hour before, he had arrived at Swan. The Nub was nervous. He walked in the building, made his way up the stairs and rang the bell. He heard someone rushing towards the door; it was a girl in her late 20's. "Not too bad," The Nub thought (she was a 6). The girl spoke softly in broken English. Later the nub would find out that the girl is Korean, and he would ask her name which he would forget after a few seconds. "First time?" the Nub was asked. "Yes." After some formalities, the nub took a quick shower and then he was ready for some therapy. Things had been a little awkward till this point because of The Nub's inexperience. The therapy began. The Nub could barely feel the girl’s hands on his back. The massage was very light, mechanical, and not energetic at all. Later he was asked to flip over. The Nub thought that things would get better from then on. However, the mechanical massage continued on The Nub's shoulders, legs and arms. After a few more minutes the girl said, "Ok...Done..."
"That's it?" the nub asked.
"Yes, massagi only here" the girl said.
The nub thought, "What! You call that a massage?" but he only smiled.
The nub was totally disappointed and walked out. The therapy had not relieved he Nub’s stress. However, he had learned from this experience and he would not any sleep over it. But, he will never go back to Swan.

CabDriver52

01-16-07, 20:18

WTF is going on? The time before last (like a month ago) the place was PACKED, crazy busy. The last time (last week. Sorry no post.computer problems) no water. Was mildly upset but the EXCELLENT service made up for it. Saw Gina. She spent a long time talking to the little man, he had fun as did I. Round and round we went until 70 minutes lapsed.

Strange. How does this shit happen. I was saving up for this weekend. Ok I'll have to look elsewhere. The location was convenient. Ok. Moving on.

It would appear the Oriental Spa is MIA too. No posts on CL at all. Usually there's 1-2 per day. Plus a pic. Damn! Time to break out the good tequila.

I'll try at least to do some recon this weekend. Will post if I can.

Cabbie

PS sorry about the clementines and farts.

DCrez

01-16-07, 21:37

Geezus, from arguably one of the nation's top3 AMP cities to dead and buried in less than a year? I have a few more places in mind to check, but on recent attempts at Eye and Supra I was confronted with a bad atmosphere, and more importantly, an unattractive woman- so I passed. Now Sun dead too?

Iffn any mongers know of where business is still proper but dont want to post it public (understandable, at this sad juncture) please PM this old salt.

In the meantime. Am I stuck with the $$$ never-worth-it of Eros? Or the who-fucking-knows-what-to-expect of Craigslist?

Sad times in DC!

LoveLOS

01-17-07, 00:13

Nube-
Great Prose. The fictional character made a few theoretical mistakes. First time here? An affirmative response in a rub-n-tug state like Va/Md is consignment to massagi only. No extras. In DC, that is throretically recoverable with experience. Keep up the good work.

Sun was alive and well, with hot water, on Sunday night at 1-2am...

LL had the distinct pleasure at that evening to confer with his bride to be. I do notice that a lot of you guys keep wishing her well and giving her pointers for the honeymoon, but c'mon, why the fuck do I have to wait 20 minutes while you guys chat with her...

I would like to film an instructional video with Ms LL2B on "How to Please LL Sexually." I could simply play that for SWMBO and one of two things would happen:
1. She would take the instruction and LL would be a satisfied man.
2. She would divorce LL and LL would be a free man.

Oh yes, Ms LL2B is still a Private label keeper...
LoveLOS

PS - If any of you guys get the chance, walk by Sun and report the status... I think this is a rumor mill thing. Navy is the only one to have actually reported this, and that was a comment in passing in a report about 1818 - just 24 hours after my visit. N1, Please expand on your report and confirm you have the right Sun... Cabbie - here is your chance to be our hero...

Big Red50

01-17-07, 01:35

Nube,

Great Prose. The fictional character made a few theoretical mistakes. First time here? An affirmative response in a rub-n-tug state like Va/Md is consignment to massagi only. No extras. In DC, that is throretically recoverable with experience. Keep up the good work.

Sun was alive and well, with hot water, on Sunday night at 1-2am.

LL had the distinct pleasure at that evening to confer with his bride to be. I do notice that a lot of you guys keep wishing her well and giving her pointers for the honeymoon, but c'mon, why the fuck do I have to wait 20 minutes while you guys chat with her.

I would like to film an instructional video with Ms LL2B on "How to Please LL Sexually." I could simply play that for SWMBO and one of two things would happen:

1. She would take the instruction and LL would be a satisfied man.

2. She would divorce LL and LL would be a free man.

Oh yes, Ms LL2B is still a Private label keeper.

LoveLOS

PS - If any of you guys get the chance, walk by Sun and report the status... I think this is a rumor mill thing. N1 is the only one to have actually reported thi